Anybody who has ever been hounded by a debt collection agency will be able to appreciate this one.
But first to put it into some historical perspective for you.
As you all know, on our return from the farm last July, Patti slipped and fell in Hazard, Kentucky and broke two bones in her left leg. (serious "oh crap!" stuff) Her injury required next day surgery and a couple of overnighters in the local hospital.
The hospital bill was about $12,600. With the insurance payment plus the four regular installment payments Patti sent, we were down to the last $31.25 when they sent it to a collection agency.
Here is Patti's letter to the Credit Bureau.
January 12, 2006
Dear Credit Bureau,
Why they referred this to you when I have been making continuous and steady payments all along mystifies me. I would have sent the final amount in the next couple of days, as I am feeling quite flush with an infusion of cash since the New Year.
Oh well. You will notice that the check I wrote is for $30, and that therefore I still owe $1.25. I dispute that amount. I don’t believe it is accurate, but since it is only $1.25, I would have paid it anyhow just to be done with the whole affair, except for one thing
I consulted my astrologist and she said that this month and next (thru February 22nd)I must steer entirely clear of all uneven numbers, lest more bad luck befall me. And believe me, what with a broken leg courtesy of your fine state, and the various other medical issues I have, I don’t need any more bad luck. She was quite adamant about this. She said you’d just have to wait another six weeks or so for your $1.25. She said you’d understand that messing with the stars is a serious matter and not to be risked for anything.
My astrologist also said that if any person in your agency who reads this letter is a Capricorn or Aquarian, it could be fatal for them to eat any fried foods in the next 10 weeks. She’s never been wrong yet. Well, you can’t say you haven’t been alerted to the danger, even though I know how hard it is, what with you Southern folk having such a love affair with the fried and starchy goodies.
Have a blessed and safe 2006.
Sincerely,
